Lessons in Not Overdoing
Most people come to Puerto Vallarta and have a fabulous time. On the other hand, there are those who go overboard in all the wrong places, and we mean that literally.
When you go to the beach it’s going to be HOT; you are much closer to the equator than where you hail from. If you are like the standard tourist, you’ll be exposing parts of your body that don’t likely see the sun on a regular basis. In some cases, never. We’re not talking just about underarms and backs of knees, though these are prime places to get blistered but good. Sun screen is available everywhere, in the large supermarkets, pharmacies, the OXXO’s (those 7-ll type stores that seem to be on every corner), and gift shops. This is intense heat and shouldn’t shine on you for more than half an hour, if you don’t want to look like a boiled lobster. Looking like one is almost as bad as feeling like one. Hats are advised, as well as the sarongs for sale everywhere. The sarongs here in Puerto Vallarta are called pareos and suitable for men, women and children. Wrap one around your waist and toss another over your shoulders.
The other thing people overdo in Puerto Vallarta has to do with liquids. Water should be your main drink, all day, every day. When drinking alcohol, have a glass of water between each cocktail. It’ll keep you just as busy and make your head less spinney in the mornings. Dehydration is the number cause of self-induced trauma. When the girl in the disco, dressed as a bandolero tries to pour shots down your throat, all the while pounding on your head and demanding pesos, just say no. Avoid jello shots, which contain the most intoxicating, cheapest booze available. If you’re worried about ice, don’t be. It’s purified, just like the water that comes out of the big blue bottles. Finally, limit yourself and make a group decision about your limitations. Carry only enough cash in pesos to drink that maximum and get you back home. Drinking is a team sport, in which you make your own rules. Make sure you’re winning at the game.